How Can You Shine When You Don’t Like the Spotlight?

This morning I had coffee in the garden with one of my Celebrant colleagues where we discussed many Celebrant related topics. But one of the main things we talked about was how you can make yourself stand out in the Celebrant market when you’re really uncomfortable with all the “showy” social media marketing. 

The nature of Celebrancy, especially Wedding & Family Celebrancy is such that potential clients often want to get a ‘feel’ for a Celebrant before they even think about getting in touch to ask about availability & prices. And while it used to be enough to have a few good quality photographs on your website, nowadays couples and families are often looking for more. Which means, videos of us in action are becoming a necessary marketing tool.

The problem is that many Celebrants would rather jump off a tall building than post a video of themselves online. It’s bad enough when we get the photos back from a ceremony, and everybody in the photo looks great while we (the Celebrant) look as if we’ve been camping for a week!  I did a wedding a few months ago, and afterward, the couple very kindly sent me a photo of us all, and I kid you not, I looked as though I’d eaten the bride and the frickin groom!

But do you know what, I still posted it all over social media, and here’s why… 

  1. In my experience, couples don’t choose you based on whether you look good in photos. They choose you based on whether you look as if you are holding the space, and having fun while you’re doing it.
  2. Couples don’t pick you based on whether you are photogenic or not, they choose you based on whether the guests are smiling, laughing and generally enjoying themselves.
  3. And couples don’t watch your videos so that they can pick fault. They watch them to get a sense of your style and then if it matches what they’re looking for, they’re more likely to get in touch.

But this still doesn’t answer the question of how you can begin promoting yourself on social media when that’s just “not you”? This is a tricky one because I’m always banging on about authenticity and being true to yourself, which I do strongly believe in. And so if you don’t feel comfortable making videos then you shouldn’t have to. However, if you don’t do anything to let people know what you do, then how are potential couples or families supposed to find you?

Making Promotional Videos

  Scottish humanist wedding









My advice would be to start small. Use baby steps and start posting pics with just a few lines of text on them that showcase what you do. So maybe a testimonial over a photo, like the one on the left above, a call to action like the post in the middle, or a post highlighting the fact that you are getting bookings like the one on the right. These are all simple ways of sparking interest in what you do, and it just might be enough to encourage a couple or family to reach out to you. And then once you become comfortable with this way of promoting yourself, you can perhaps begin to move on to the next step of getting in front of a camera.

However, a big step in being able to do this is to really believe in yourself and your abilities as a Celebrant, and I’ll be covering this in the next blog.


“Believe in yourself and you will be unstoppable”